Jasmine & I went to Shoppers Drug Mart this evening to pick up some items. A woman almost my age (although I like to believe that I was definitely younger) showcasing tacky trendy brands from top to bottom was standing roughy 6-8 feet ahead of us with a teenager son (I assume).
The teenager was intentionally playing on her nerves. He touched almost each and every checkout “impulse buy item,” “Mom, I want gum, mom I want chocolate bar, may I have chips, I want Archies comic book, can you get me Nutella snack-pack, may I have this, this and that”?
“No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,” the woman was irritatingly repetitive and flat toned.
I kept myself busy just by sneak peeking at her out of place Rhine-stoned dazzling knee-high boots, her oversized Burberry bag, her freshly pampered locks of multi-toned long luscious hair. I also tried to guess her perfume from under the thick layers of my KN95 mask. I mean, that was the only branded item I was able to flaunt. At the same time, the woman placed 10 bags of milk, six bricks of butter on the check out counter. Over a nominal price discrepancy she did not fail to accuse the innocent young cashier of false advertising. The lottery machine chimed very sadly four times “not a winner” when she made the cashier check her lottery tickets, which I believe she had a lot of hopes pinned upon.
Finally, when she had to pay for the purchase, she seemed flustered looking for a particular credit card inside out of her big Burberry bag.
I was really tempted to tickle her, yank her mask off so that she could chuckle and I could see her teeth. I wanted to see if her teeth were better than the honking Burberry bag, as many of you may know that I have a fixation (for the lack of a better word, sorry) with checking out people’s teeth. I can be judgy; what can I say? I am full of human errors.
However, her son had a much better plan at the wrong moment, “Mom, mom… would you ever slap me for a million dollars”?
No answer; the mom is still striping her bag down.
Son, “Mom, would you ever slap me for ten million dollars”?
Woman, with all her might, “you shut up right now or else I would beat the hell out of you for free”!
The cashier’s face went red, Jasmine was startled, and I jumped back suddenly in self-defense too. What followed was pin-drop silence! The poor boy was just plain embarrassed, and Jasmine and I looked away interestingly at Valentine’s Day tokens of hope, love, and “conditional” love.
Well, right after they were gone, we paid for our stuff and wished the cashier a pleasant rest of the evening. The moment the sliding doors flew open for us, both Jasmine and I pulled our masks down, gave each other a silent pat on the back, and broke our long silence with each other by uttering one word each at the same time as we inhaled some chilly winter breeze, “Punjabi”!
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