My sudden move to Winnipeg six winters ago was due to a drastic change in my life… why it fell in my lap is another aspect of my being. Having lived a major part of my life in pleasant Vancouver (BC), sudden climatic change of scenery of snow dunes, snow banks and walls of snow were a little new and interesting to me. Initially, most locals could guess that I was certainly new to the province of MB because of my semi-formal tweed coats and hard-shell rain proof jackets that were good enough to keep my dry and warm in below 5 degrees at the most…not to mention I carried an umbrella with me to safeguard my hair mostly, which is very typical of someone or anyone who lives in rainy Vancouver. Even if one drives one is habitual of keeping an umbrella in the car, well at least I did. Interestingly enough, it took me a couple of severe cough and cold bouts to come in terms with the difference between the climatic extremes of BC and MB. I bought my first ever parka to combat below 45 degree wind-chill in the month of March 2011 during a massive winter clearance event at Sears in St. Vital shopping centre. It’s a mustard and beige plaid that I promise to dislike with a passion forever but it was one of the only few choices available to meet the demands of weather and my pocket at that time.

Walking down back home from the bus terminal became a Monday to Friday routine for me when I enrolled myself in a local career college roughly right after the move. Extreme cold weather of Central Canada had never bothered me since day one more than skin deep, as those regular walks became my “downtime self-discovery pathways” for me. Swooping by cars and luxury vehicles were never the objects of my desire because the sense of awe was much more powerful in me as I would admire the ornate blue sky under my feet… little did I know or realize ever before in my life that on clear days blue sky dispenses its true colour on milky white abundance of snow. The whiteness of snow gives in committedly and dutyfully to the blue reflections of vast skies. Both are selfless… the sky would come down to meet the Earth in its true colour and Earth would be waiting eagerly draped daintily under snow for this transformation, up or down wherever I would set my eyes upon, would be blue on these crystal clear, opaque blue sunny days! The distance from terminal to home did not matter to me, the deep freeze did not matter to me, what mattered to me was the mystic unison wrapped in blue… without any horizon, boundary or threshold.

No red carpet walk could ever replace my glossy, sometimes slippery but sky washed walks that I used to take during the college days. They provided me with time and space to reconnect with myself, forgive myself and above all heal myself… I learnt to embrace myself just the way sky embraced the snow clad earth…I started to rediscover myself in a non-confronting way. My concerns and worries about my future started taking refuge in those sunny blue walks… Peace was all around me.

Paving my way back home during extreme cold afternoons in the sunny blue quite walks by myself I slowly learned to create order amid the so believed uncontrollable chaos called my life. I learned to stop denying and wishing but started to live. The peace and quiet around me helped me let go of my need to control…and put everything in the hands of a higher authority. Walking down that walk-way every day I realized that life itself is a series of passages… some are noted and celebrated while others are just hurdles. One must accept fully, one must learn to go with the flow.

Never before have I testified and have found myself dissolved in four elements of life as consciously as during my walks. All of a sudden there’s no room for scepticism in the beautiful framework in and around me of those four elements. Air (wind), the breath of life rejuvenated my spirits. Each inhabited furlong of snow covered Earth, under my knee high winter boots was the reflection of majesty of my Creator…the Earth reminded me of my energy to move forward yet stay grounded during the most turbulent phase of my life. Earth, the mother knew it all about my push and pull. Illuminant bright blue spread out days have calmed the fire of agony within and replaced it with glorious warmth and comfort to soothe the soul that was awefully bruised. At the same time I was reminded to “flame on” and play the game of life yet another time, illuminate and expand my universe. Water in the form of moisture and snow helped put out the raging fires of uncontrollable sense of loss and mismanagement of the prime of my life, just like it softens the Earth and nourishes all living things alike, it let me let go of hurtful ties and connections.

My Monday to Friday walks on the blue snow have helped me essentially to free and unhinge myself . . . seems like a heavenly peace force has taken me apart piece by piece… a cell by cell… pore by pore… and then put me back together up with renewed and fortified sense and sensibility of four elements! ! “I am thankful”, is an understatement! Just say “OM” Anoop, Just say “OM”!!!

– Anoop Kaur Babra